Paranoia in the gambling den
UIC Men's Tennis continues winning streak
Sean Murray
Issue date: 3/1/10 Section: Sports
Media Credit: UICFlames.comJunior Luis Gonzaga has a 11-2 record for the season.
A disturbing shift is taking place on the UIC campus, specifically considering our gambling-fiends. The UIC world of athletic betting has been flipped on its head as of late, and the culprits for this change is the Men's Tennis Team.
UIC Men's Tennis has been on a winning-streak as of late, racking five straight wins with the recent victories over Villanova (5-2) and UMKC (7-0). Sports gambling, traditionally founded upon notions like the 'long-shot' and 'chance' is making a prompted move to more stability.
The combination of winning-streaks and economic desperation has brought smart investors into the world of UIC gambling. High stakes are now risk assessments, as adrenaline-addicts are slowly being marginalized by cheap business majors. The crazed "all in" crowd don't take too kindly to this new bunch, and the thinly veiled hate is bound to explode
How could this be? Why was one of the most reckless and irresponsible vices that organized sports has to offer degrading into a breeding ground for easy investments and safe returns? My instincts told me it had something to do with this new winning streak. So to get to the bottom of the matter, like any good journalist, I set up the Sports Desk at a nearby gambling den.
The pristine-bourgeoisie flavor of the Hindsdale Racquet Club, UIC Tennis' home away from home, offers a stark contrast to the decrepit backroom of which I found myself. The strong fluorescent lights of the court were no match to the neon glows which illuminated the hallway where I set up shop. They 'fans' began to congregate around like staved hyenas. These were no ordinary Tennis fans, but they focused on the events of the game as if their lives depended on it.
Deadbeat dads mingled with MBAs and douche-bag investment bankers. Amphetamine-jacked banshees stood shoulder to shoulder with market analysts and statisticians. Indiscernible and outlandish outbursts from one group created a symphonic collage with the timid hum's and recitations of formulas by the other.
The sheer sense of teetering on the edge of an all out street-fight was in the air. This was pushed to a crescendo when word struck of Senior Sebastian Lystad's victory. Lystad instills as much faith in the average UIC tennis fan as God does for the Pope. This is not good for adrenaline-fiends, especially when money is at stake. Lystad took victory like a narcoleptic takes a nap, defeating both the Wildcat's Alex Lesser and The Kangaroos' Bret Berryman.
|
UIC Men's Tennis has been on a winning-streak as of late, racking five straight wins with the recent victories over Villanova (5-2) and UMKC (7-0). Sports gambling, traditionally founded upon notions like the 'long-shot' and 'chance' is making a prompted move to more stability.
The combination of winning-streaks and economic desperation has brought smart investors into the world of UIC gambling. High stakes are now risk assessments, as adrenaline-addicts are slowly being marginalized by cheap business majors. The crazed "all in" crowd don't take too kindly to this new bunch, and the thinly veiled hate is bound to explode
How could this be? Why was one of the most reckless and irresponsible vices that organized sports has to offer degrading into a breeding ground for easy investments and safe returns? My instincts told me it had something to do with this new winning streak. So to get to the bottom of the matter, like any good journalist, I set up the Sports Desk at a nearby gambling den.
The pristine-bourgeoisie flavor of the Hindsdale Racquet Club, UIC Tennis' home away from home, offers a stark contrast to the decrepit backroom of which I found myself. The strong fluorescent lights of the court were no match to the neon glows which illuminated the hallway where I set up shop. They 'fans' began to congregate around like staved hyenas. These were no ordinary Tennis fans, but they focused on the events of the game as if their lives depended on it.
Deadbeat dads mingled with MBAs and douche-bag investment bankers. Amphetamine-jacked banshees stood shoulder to shoulder with market analysts and statisticians. Indiscernible and outlandish outbursts from one group created a symphonic collage with the timid hum's and recitations of formulas by the other.
The sheer sense of teetering on the edge of an all out street-fight was in the air. This was pushed to a crescendo when word struck of Senior Sebastian Lystad's victory. Lystad instills as much faith in the average UIC tennis fan as God does for the Pope. This is not good for adrenaline-fiends, especially when money is at stake. Lystad took victory like a narcoleptic takes a nap, defeating both the Wildcat's Alex Lesser and The Kangaroos' Bret Berryman.
Be the first to comment on this story