"In case one of us starts likin' on the other"
Fae Rabin
Issue date: 3/8/10 Section: Features
What meaning do those words hold, when spoken in a bar between a man and a woman? Does the meaning change when the setting changes? What if instead the situation involved a woman talking to another woman in school? It may not be enough to generically compute the combined definitions of the words to know where the speaker is coming from, nor what he or she is hoping for. For some at UIC, the readiness of someone else's words to be interpreted as a come-on remain ambiguous, regardless of sexual orientation.
Robert Sanoshy, a therapist and coordinator at the Center for Contextual Change believes in more situations than not, what is lacking is direct communication.
"We still look at sexual behaviors as very much taboo. While I think we've come a tremendous distance as far as a more generalized acceptance of non-heterosexual identity, we have not yet embraced sexuality. The difference is, I think we're more okay with alternative sexualities, but we haven't embraced sexuality as a whole. We all have our label whether straight or not but beyond that, we're not really dialoguing about sexuality. We're comfortable about knowing the label, but as it relates to dialogue and behavior - it doesn't happen enough," said Sanoshy.
The distinction between general public comfort with the knowledge of sex identity versus sex itself is highlighted by the difficulty experienced by members of the growing categories of sexual identity.
Sanoshy explained: "Other people's sexuality freaks us out - not necessarily their label, but who they have sex with, if they want to have sex with us...and even why we want to have sex with the people we want to have sex with."
On this campus, the possibility exists of meeting someone who does not fit into the stereotypical gender/sex role as either a straight male or straight female, as well as meeting people who do. Not only does the possibility of meeting them exist, but also the possibility of "hitting on" any number of these students, as well as being "hit on" yourself. Unless by their own personal desire, no student is required to wear some identifying attire to take the guess work out of their sexual preference to passersby.
Robert Sanoshy, a therapist and coordinator at the Center for Contextual Change believes in more situations than not, what is lacking is direct communication.
"We still look at sexual behaviors as very much taboo. While I think we've come a tremendous distance as far as a more generalized acceptance of non-heterosexual identity, we have not yet embraced sexuality. The difference is, I think we're more okay with alternative sexualities, but we haven't embraced sexuality as a whole. We all have our label whether straight or not but beyond that, we're not really dialoguing about sexuality. We're comfortable about knowing the label, but as it relates to dialogue and behavior - it doesn't happen enough," said Sanoshy.
The distinction between general public comfort with the knowledge of sex identity versus sex itself is highlighted by the difficulty experienced by members of the growing categories of sexual identity.
Sanoshy explained: "Other people's sexuality freaks us out - not necessarily their label, but who they have sex with, if they want to have sex with us...and even why we want to have sex with the people we want to have sex with."
On this campus, the possibility exists of meeting someone who does not fit into the stereotypical gender/sex role as either a straight male or straight female, as well as meeting people who do. Not only does the possibility of meeting them exist, but also the possibility of "hitting on" any number of these students, as well as being "hit on" yourself. Unless by their own personal desire, no student is required to wear some identifying attire to take the guess work out of their sexual preference to passersby.
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